Letter I

Dear sweet pea, princess

Well beautiful I've been thinking of you lately, the way you'll look will you be a replica of your daddy or will you have my dark brown eyes.

I'm trying my hardest to keep this world safe for us baby, but it's hard seeing as the ones that are in charge are the one's that are causing this craziness, but don't you worry baby I'll try to keep our home safe for us.

Beautiful I know that bringing you into this world won't be easy not only that but the thought of me ruining your life kills me every day, but know one thing sweet pea your daddy will be there to keep me sane and content.

I really hope that I'll get to give you an older brother to take care of you and be your saving grace. Baby I don't know what my future or yours will hold but I want to make sure that if me or your daddy aren't there that you'll still have love and safety in your life baby.

Sweet pea first thing I want to teach you is to pray to God for anything you want cause you were once my wish, my dream, my prayer and look how your tiny hand are wrapped around my finger.

Baby I know for sure when you come into mine and your daddy's life our love will multiply.

Cause baby

I can't wait to see that little beautiful face,

I can't wait to see your daddy's eyes sparkle with pride,

I can't wait to see you sand up on your tiny feet,

I can't wait for you to start talking,

I can't wait for the day I get to braid your beautiful hair,

I can't wait for you to enter my life,

Baby I can't wait to see you with my own eyes.

I know baby that you'll cry days at night and I'll try to hush you down with a couple of words, baby I hope you remember them cause one day I way not be there to tell you them so remember them, remember how much love they held.

After writing all of that baby I remembered that I may not get the chance to feel all of that, I don't know if I'll get a future with you and your daddy, that's why your always in my prayers....baby once you get older I'll tell you all the prayers I prayed for you and me.

If I ever get to see your beautiful eyes just for a moment that would make me the happiest person alive, so baby if your daddy ever gives you this letter without me know that I mean each and every word in it.

Baby take care of your daddy please.

Your mommy, your guardian

Forever looking over you,

Aceel RD

1st of December, 2014

Engaged?

Chapter 11

Ma'an's POV:

As I sat in the plane, waiting for take off I remembered the text I got yesterday I'm sure it's Diana who else could it be? -sending- "Diana?"..... W Al7mdullah I reached safely, after I got settled in Jordan.

 I opened the text again and saw it was seen but there wasn't a response, i wondered why did she ignored it was weird. So I decided to call and see how everything's going over there.

Mum: "hay honey, I missed you, I guess all those fit (hot in British) girls in Jordan made you forget your family." -jokingly-

Me: "Al7mdullah wallah mum I really miss you, tsk tsk you know none of them can compare to you."

Mum: -laughing- "how's college and the housing are you settled down alright?"

Me: "Started going to classes at the Royal Jordanian Air Academy. As for the housing I found a house near the academy, the country is really nice talk to dad and come visit me as soon as possible"

Mum: "inshallah honey of course, allah ywf8ak w yysrlak all your studies (prayer in Arabic)"

Me: "Ya I wanted to ask you what happened with the girl?"

Mum: "I called her mum and she said the girl has already gotten engaged"

Me: "....... What engaged??! When and who?" -shocked-

Mum: "I don't know but her mother told me it wasn't an official engagement, because the boy's mother wants them to get to know each other first and see where it go's from there" -calmly-

Me:"..........., isn't she suppose to be my fiancé?!!!" *i remembered the text at the same time who could it be from?*

Mum: "they got there before us" "it was for the best either way" -hushed voice-

Me: "I know that didn't like her from the beginning, the problem is you know that I wanted her and you staled till they got her first"

Mum: "I'm your mother and I know what's best for you, don't think about her God will bring you someone better, only good will happen"

Me: "what I wanted is what's gonna happen"

Mum: "9le 3la Al nbe (like a phase we say it's like calm down) and think of your studies"

Me: "inshallah take care of yourself, say hi to dad and goodnight"

Mum: "of course inshallah, you too take care of yourself and goodnight"

After I finished the phone call I went to sleep.

The next day after jama'ah prayer in the mosque I went back home and thought I've got a bit of time why don't I get dressed up today, dressing up in a pair of dark jeans and black V-neck.

As I was in college i remembered the text, who could it be from, I sat there thinking about 'those days', what's weird is that were there really people that still had my number *it's funny thinking about it*.

Finishing my classes, walking out of the academy by mistake I bumped into a girl.

Me: *isn't she a beauty* oooh sorry i didn't mean to bump into you, did you get hurt"

The girl: "no I'm the one that's sorry, It was my fault"

Me: "are you in our academy?"

The girl: "no me and my friend were suppose to meet up here so she can take me home but she just canceled, telling me she got busy"

Me: "ooh, that's not a problem I'll take you, if you don't mind...."

The girl: "mmmm okay"

Me: "just a thought but you kinda look familia"

The girl: "oh really?" -her mouth went into a small O-

Me: "you just reminded me of someone...."

The girl: -smiled-

As we were walking we started to talk about ourselves, majors and stuff she turned out to be a Jordanian that lived in Saudi (jeddah), her major was design. 

Reaching her house at her door.

The girl: "Come,eat some lunch with us your more that welcomed and drink a cup of coffee."

Me: "no I won't bother you, next time inshallah"

The girl: "okay I won't take more of your time"

Me: "just a thought we we kinda didn't get to know each other's names"

The girl: "I'm Judie"

Me: "I'm Ma'an, it was a pleasure talking to you"

Judie: "the pleasure's mine, don't forget you said that you'll come and eat some dinner next time"

Me: "hhhhh, it was a blast don't worry inshallah, this is my number" -handing her my number-

Judie: "take care"

Me: "you too"

After that I went to gym, had dinner with the boys, talking, having fun it turned out it was 12 so basically that means my day ended.

As I reached home my phone rang.

Me: "Hla (hi in Arabic) Sa'ad, how are you man? Missed you"

Sa'ad: "Hla bek (the usual reply to Hla) Hla bl engaged Hla ble passed us over"

Me: -laughing- "engaged? Engaged what?" -confused-

Sa'ad: "really man you throw a couple of words at that time and think I'm that stupid to understand them"

Me: -laughing- "easy Mr I can catch it while it's flying"

Sa'ad: "you know it, wallah you guys are getting all high and mighty, one's getting married, 2 are engaged"

Me: "Yallah 38bal ma nfr7 fek Ya 7beb 8lbe (a saying you say when someone congrats you on your proposal or wedding if your not married or engaged already it's like saying your next inshallah) but I haven't proposed yet, she kind of got away I'll tell you about it tomorrow I wanna sleep now. Mashallah who's the other one that got engaged too?"

-Aceel RD

Twitter: @misscareful

Ask: @backstagewriter

Mum and dad's little conversation

Chapter 10

I know I don't write any notes and stuff, but I really really wanted to thank my amazing cousin for helping me basically write the chapter, you know I love Ya even when I say I don't. ❤️

Diana POV:

As the week went on, I remember walking through the living room hearing mum and dad's hushed voices.

Mum: "so honey what do you think of Fares?"

Dad: "wallah he's a respectful boy, well raised and known, asking about him more I found out his prayers were persistent in the mosque too."

Mum: "mashallah God bless him, I asked about them and Fares, found the same things as you did a respectful, well known family."

Dad: "I think we should let them talk and get to know each other, if there was any good in it God will ease the way and from that we'll get to know the boy more."

Mum: "Ya his mum also suggested that they get to know each other before they got officially engaged, I think that would be for the best too." "What about Ma'an? Any news about him? Did you ask about him?"

Dad: "wallah Ma'an's a well raised, respectful boy, his family too." "His father's works with us in Aramco"

Mum: "Mmmm mmmm"

Dad: "But I've heard that Ma'an has had a bit of a background"

Mum: "mmmm"

Dad: "but I didn't come to say that, cause you know people change, everyone has had that period in life where they have done a couple of things, so don't we forget ourselves"

Mum: "of course we can't only look at him from that side, cause truth is we have no right to judge him the only one that can judge him or us is the one above"

After listening to that I walked to room, started thinking about there conversation, what they said about Ma'an and Fares.

It's like we look at some people and think of them as Angels but the truth is they're just Devils acting and dressing up like angels, I'm not saying that none of them are any good or that I'm judging them.

But that I accepted the idea of being with Ma'an and rejected the idea of being with Fares because of the things that have happened between us........

-Aceel RD

Twitter: @misscareful

Ask: @backstagewriter

Memories

Chapter 9

Mr know it all POV:

Looking at our past we may blame it on the what if's or the people in it but if you looked closer you'd see that no one really forced you to do all the things your ashamed of.

Looking around my room i remembering my past the way people would change once they heard my name or should I say my dad's name, like all those people you'd think my life was perfect, luxurious, that I was spoon feed truth is my life was half half I never got everything I wanted I had to work for it but not every time.

But I never really used my name a lot, besides the boys won't let me even if I tried, growing up together made us like brothers even though we keep each other sane sometimes it gets out of the hand but the beauty of it when we get busted we get busted together.

We basically shared our lives together going out, having fun but there came a time where I just go bored for numbering girls thinking of taking a break out of all of it, they never seem to change either they were too slutty or too innocent.

So about 3 years ago as every other summer me and the boys went to our beach Vila, we swam a bit, got a light tan.

At night we got dressed and went to the marina to have fun or basically pick up birds (British word that means girls or chicks), as we reached the marina it was a bit down not so many people.

Sitting at a table with the boys, looking around I saw Saad with a couple of boys that were with me in school, so I decided to go and say hi.

Me: "hay saad how have you been man? How's your family? " -giving him a man hug-

Saad: "hay man not bad wallah, you?"

Me: "not bad too, how about you and the boys join us?"

Saad: "we're actually passing through we're going to Omar's he's having this party at this Vila, I bet he won't mind me inviting you and the boys"

Me: "thanks man I'll see what the boys think"

Saad: "alright man I'll be heading there now, so hopefully I'll see you there"

Me: "Ya man inshallah"

Heading back to the boys asking them if they did wanna go, they looked at me and said "are you f%*+ing crazy of course, Omar's hosting it" so after that we headed to Omar's Vila cause it was close to the marina we decided we should walk there.

Going inside music thumping, smoke clouding, lights shining looking at the living room or what's suppose to be the living room turned into a massive dance floor and how all the furniture's cramped in a little corner in the living room.

Without wasting another minute, I saw the boys joining a couple of girls on the dance floor, going to the bar It was packed with everything basically from vodka to root beer, taking a can on red bull i sat looking at the scene trying to get in the mood.

Looking at my left I saw Majed sitting beside himself deciding to go have a chat with him, walking through sweaty grinding bodies I reached him.

Me: "hay man how have you been? It's been ages" -sitting beside him-

Majed: "oh hi man I've been good, you?" -looking up from this lap-

Me: "not bad wallah, why am I not seeing you on the dance floor busting a move?" -winking-

Majed: "not really in the mood man"

Me: "what's up man?"

Majed: "you know reema man she totally bailed on me"

Me: "man don't think about her then, go have fun live a little"

Majed: "I can't stop thinking" -groaning-

Me: "alright man, get up"

Majed: -getting up-

Me: "go home majed, go talk to her or something your not gotta feel any better here".

Talking my advice he straight away got up and was out of the door, after a few redbulls and a bit of dancing I decided it was time to go back i wasn't really in the mood of partying.

Walking down the sidewalk, hands in my pockets lost in my thoughts till I nearly got run over by this girl, if I didn't catch her giggling frame.

The girl: "oh I'm sorry, I didn't see where I was going" -trying to calm herself down-

Me: "it's alright"

Looking down at her she only reached my chest, looking at her little details, I was too caught up in my thoughts I didn't hear what she said.

Me: "huh?"

The girl: "can you get your claws off of me?" -annoyingly-

Me: "you should thank god that I was the one you ran into not some drunk" -letting go of her-

The girl: "how do I know your not a drunk?" -jabbing her finger at my chest-

Me: "honey if I was you would still be innocent" -winking-

The girl: "oh my god"

Me: "+ I wasn't the one that was running out of the bushes at 4 o'clock in the morning" -stating the fact-

The girl: "don't act like you know everything, you don't know my reasons" -angrily walking off-

Me: "hay hay hay I didn't mean it as in that way, I meant a girl like you shouldn't be out alone at this time" -jogging up to her-

The girl: "stop with stating all the facts 'Mr know it all' it's annoying, thank you I'll get going" -walking off-

Me: "at least let me walk you to your Vila"

The girl: "uuuugh do you have to?"

Me: "ya I want to"

The girl: "alright then" -mumbling-

Looking at her she was weird but good weird, the way her hair was in a high ponytail still flowed down her back or her outfit it wasn't like the rest of the girls that are at the resorts these days, she had on this military jacket that was 3x bigger than her, white tank top underneath it and some dark pair of jeans paired with some dark brown shoes.

Not being able to continue looking at her I saw her point at a Vila, looks like that's her's.

The girl: "alright then, thanks again for the company"

Me: "of course anytime" -smiling-

The girl: "goodnight" -walking up the path-

Me: *sh^* I forgot to ask her name, ask for her number or something* "hay hay" -jogging up the front of the path-

The girl : "yes?" -waiting-

Me: "never asked you about your name"

The girl: "oh right you can call me D"

Me: "you know you never asked what mine was too"

The girl: "I think I'll stick with Mr know it all" -winking-

Me: "alright then, see you around D"

D: "see you around"

Me: "mind me asking you one last thing?"

D: "of course"

Me: "mind giving me your number, twitter, path or Kik?"

D: "mmmm well I'll give you my Kik" -taking the phone out of my hands, then looking at me sideways-

Me: -looking at her questionable-

D: "it's locked" -smiling-

Me: "oh Ya" -typing the passcode in, gave it back to her-

D: "alright then here you go, good night" -handling it back to me-

Me: "good night D, sweet dreams"

Making sure she got in the Vila i continued my walk to the Vila, going inside I saw it was still closed *looks like the boys will stay out till the morning* looking at the clock it was 4:30 AM.

Knowing I'm gonna be the only one sober tomorrow I decided to sleep so I can wake up tomorrow and help the boys.

Laying on my bed I kept on thinking about the black haired beauty I saw today, remembering the scene I slept that night with a big smile on my face.

Looking around the room i saw the folder what folder you may ask the folder that contained some of the best memories of my life, it was a folder that contained uncountable letter and poetry.

Looking through it I saw the last poem I remembered her reading it to me, the way she read every word with so much emotion, the way her eyes were pooled with tears at the end of it, the way she wanted to rip it into pieces of i didn't take it out of her hands.

Taking a deep breath I read it for the tenth millioned time

"They thought we were crazy, two lovers from Saudi

Why was it crazy?

Cause all they've heard about us was our money

Is it true , or are we to lame to see the truth?

No one has ever heard of a saudi love story

That's why they think our land is where love dies

With a blink of an eye

But have hear our story?

Do we have to write it in their memories

So they can remember it?

All I want is to see a day were when they think of saudi they think of its people too not only its money and patrol

To think of our beautiful souls."

No matter how much I read it I can't stop not feeling it, I can't stop not wanting to know the what if....

-Aceel RD

Twitter: @misscareful

Ask: @backstagewriter

Mr know it all

Chapter 8

Diana's POV:

My head was spinning I can't seem to get the thought that HE was here in my guest room.

*hoping that we all stay in the room or that mum takes me with her and HIS mum*

Mum: "Honey these are Al-X"

HIS Mum: "You can call me auntie Randa" -smiling at me sweetly-

After saying hi to her, I sat beside her and talked for a bit she was so sweet and kind bless her heart.

Suddenly I heard dad say "Hana'a how about we step out with Mrs Al-X and leave the kids to talk and get to know each other"

Mentally screaming *"no why dad?? Please stay"* -pounding- I saw dad smile at me before closing the door after him.

Hearing a manly voice behind me I saw that he suddenly decided to talk, knowing this night couldn't get worser.

HIM : "hay so that was weird right?" -smiling slightly-

Me: "ya well kinda"

HIM: "so what uni are you in? Private or public?"

Me: "public King XX you?"

HIM: "nice same here" "so how's your summer been?"

Me: "not bad yours?"

HIM: " took a summer semester so I can finish a year ahead, it's alright been sleeping it out"

Me: "sleeping it out?" -confused-

HIM: "I mean me and the boys come to the class and sleep" -chuckling *like he was remembering something*-

Me: "oh" "I bet you one of those boys that don't care about a single thing" -mumbling- *but you know that's so wrong Diana*

HIM: "sorry? I didn't catch that wanna know my GPA?"

Me: "I bet it's 3.4 or lower" -hissing-

HIM: "Actually darning it's 4.8 so say that again" you can hear how egoistic he is *GOD*

Me: "good for you well"

HIM: "woooh what's wrong?"

Me: -smiling sweetly- "nothing at all"

HIM: "so tell me more about yourself"

Me: *why is he making this harder please god I wanna get out of here* "like what?"

HIM: "what's the picture you have for your future? Like do you see yourself a housewife or a working lady?"

Me: "of course a working lady and that won't change" -getting angry *what's wrong with everyone thinking I would stay at home and just wait for the money to come to me*

HIM: "Diana....I just wanted to know what you want of your future that's it" -offended-

Me: "sorry Ya i wanna work in the future and have a family at the same time" *remembering the picture I have for my future*

HIM: "that's really a really great...I really like how passionate you are"

Me: "thanks"

HIM: "You kind of remind me of someone..."

Me: "oh...."

My lifesaver my iPhone started ringing and i sprinted out of the room thanking God he gave me an escape but not before saying "I'm sorry I have to take this, I might not see you again so goodnight" hearing a mumbled answer I closed the door and went to my room.

Answering it was lana of my closest friends that's studying in the UK, we talk every while I miss her so much she's one of old childhood friends we're like sisters.

Lana: "hi babez"

Me: "hi babe how are you?"

Lana: "I'm good you?"

Me: "not bad you kinda saved me" -laughing-

Lana: "oh really so what did you do know miss little troublemaker?"

Me: "lana, you know I'm not a troublemaker, it's just I was in another 'rightful look'"

Lana: "your still up with those, Diana you know that's so old-fashion everyone's dating and falling in love then getting married"

Me: "Lana you know I don't want to marry that way" -groaning-

Lana: "I can never understand your mind, I hope you get what you want in the end"

Me: "guess who came today ?"

Lana: "who?"

Me: "Al-X"

Lana: "isn't that Mr know it all's surname..???" -screaming-

Me: "ya can you imagine?"

Lana: "NO way !! How does he look now?"

Me: "10x hotter + his ego grew 10x's more"

Lana: "man now I wanna see him can you snapchat him for me?"

Me: "what? Lana you've be kidding me?"

Lana: "actually I'm not but whatever I know you'll never do it"

Me: "first thing I already told him goodnight second thing he'll know"

Lana: "okay okay don't get your panties in a twist, did he recognise you?"

Me: "I don't think so, I hope not"

Lana: "but Diana it's so cute maybe it's fate?"

Me: "non of that's my fate, It may have been my past but I hope it's not my future"

Lana: "I don't know but it kinda feels like a fairytale" -dreamily

Me: "whatever I'm not gonna have this convo with you now, now tell me who's the heartbreaker that's breaking my best friend's heart?"

Lana: "who? You know i don't have one" -denying-

Me: "Ya ya it was me what was sobbing and tweeting heartbreaking stuff"

Lana: "what the heck? How the hell do you know that?"

Me: "you know lana I have my ways"

Lana: "it's nothing"

Me: "you know, I'm always here for you"

Lana: "I know that babe thank you"

Me: "your most welcome, so how's summer in Manchester?"

Lana: "amazing I'm going to little mix's concert tomorrow"

Me: "lucky you man I wish I was with you"

Lana: "you know that offer still stands the one that you come and stay with me I've already got a house here so you won't have to pay a lot if that's what your thinking about even though I know that's not the case"

Me: "you know why and I wanna finish here"

Lana: "okay okay look at the time it's 12 at your time"

Me: "really we took that much time?"

Lana: "you know it always happens"

Me: "ya it does Yallah I've to go to sleep, I start this summer job tomorrow"

Lana: "okay babez , goodnight"

Me: "goodnight babe and sweet dreams".

Knowing Al-X left a long time ago, I went to my dresser, took out my Pj's and put them on.

Sleepy I took out my old notebook looking through it i saw the dried flower I pressed between the pages, picking it up i remembered the day I spread my words on these empty sheets.

Laying you down between my pages

Covering you with my words

Erasing all your scars and wounds

Letting you go after

Here's your new age

Listening to your laughter

Is the only thing that matters.

All my feelings come crashing back down, God give me the strength to see another day, to believe that I'll be okay.

-Aceel RD

Twitter: @misscareful

Ask: @backstagewriter

My destiny?

Chapter 7

Diana POV:

It's been a two weeks since I meet Ma'an, I keep waking up to his flowers *not his flowers I mean the ones he gave me going on* I know I should throw them in the bin, it's just their too beautiful + I can't seem to get the courage to throw them maybe I'll do it tomorrow *you say that every day*.

So as every other day in my summer vacation I was boxed up in my room, listening to music and texting my friends, but them mum came in.

Mum: "Diana you really should clean your room soon" -disgusting look-

Me: "inshallah" -smiling-

Mum: "so what do you have now?"

Me: "nothing wait for you to tell me what we have planned today"

Mum: "okay perfect we're going shopping" -clapping her hands and smiling-

Me: "mum" -groaning- "you know I hate going shopping for no reason"

Mum: "we won't be long, don't worry"

Me: "mum do we have to?"

Mum: "come on honey I'll take you to a café after" -smiling- *she knew how to play with my mind*

Me: "in that case I'll be down in ten mins"

Mum: "I'll wear my abaya and wait for you in the car, your dad's driving us so don't be late"

Me: "okay mum"

Going up to her I kissed her head, went to get ready switching my summer dress into a pair of light jeans and a white summer blouse.

Putting a little lipstick, taking my bag I went out to the car.

Getting inside the car, mum and dad were talking among themselves so I just plugged my headphones and listened to a bit of music.

Stealing a few looks at mum and dad, it's like they have their own language *if only I had that with someone*.

As we reached the mall mum gave dad a little wave and we were off.

Mum: "Diana where do you wanna go first?"

Me: "mum i don't know" "I don't even know why we're here" -mumbling-

Mum: "okay so Debenhams it is" -smiling-

Me: "let's get this over with" -groaning-

Mum: "come on honey"

After going around Debenhams 5 times, we bought 2 blouses and one six inch black heel.

Me: "mum why are we still going around the shops? I don't need anything do you?" 

Mum: "honey you know it's summer so you'll get invented to lots of parties so you need new stuff"

Me: "your right but please I don't wanna go around all the mall"

Mum: "don't worry honey a few shops then we'll go to the café"

After about 2 hours she finally said we can go to Costa (café) *thank god my feet are killing me + I need a hot cup of caramel mocha*

After finding a place in Costa we sat down, ordered 2 cups of Carmel mocha and a double chocolate chip muffin.

When our orders came we started chatting.

Mum: "honey you know I didn't tell you the whole truth"

Me: "in what?" -confused-

Mum: "you know how Al-X came and saw you two weeks ago"

Me: "Ya mum?"

Mum: "it's just they never gave us an answer honey and I can't let you wait an eternity for nothing"

Me: "Ya I know of course mum" *i knew they wouldn't give an answer, I understood*

Mum: "so honey you know I took you today to buy stuff and you bought that perfect ruby knee length dress?"

Me: "ya...."

Mum: "honey tonight you have another 'Rightful look" -smiling shyly-

Me: "what?" *is she serious?*

Mum: "honey I can't stop your destiny, you don't know where your Mr perfect could be"

Me: "mum it's too early" -whining-

Mum: "honey your not gonna loose a thing"

Me: "dad knows?"

Mum: "ya he does"

Me: "okay mum"

Mum: "so that's a yes right?"

Me: "ya mum it's a yes" -smiling-

We reached the house at about 5pm so we where late cause mum told them to come at 8 so I don't have much time.

Getting ready I took a shower, wrapping a towel around my body and another one around my hair.

Going back to my room I saw the new dress ironed on the bed ready for me to wear it, so I wore my underwear, slipped on the dress and started my make up.

After I finished putting a bit of lipgloss, I looked at the mirror looking at my self i just had a bit of mascara and little blush on with my light pink lipgloss it looked soft the way I like it.

Making sure I wore my heels I went down the stairs to the kitchen expecting our maid to tell me to bring the juice in like always, but she just gave me a cup of water saying that mum said the boy wanted it. *i haven't even asked mum his name*

Step by step I was trying not to spill the water on my dress, I opened the door and went in.

The room suddenly became quite, trying to walk straightly without spilling the water I had in the tray.

As I reached HIM I looked up to his face I saw it was.

-Aceel RD

Twitter: @misscareful

Ask: @backstagewriter